"God is so Good!" Or not...

A few weeks ago, my husband's cousin(R.) was in a bad ATV accident.  He had to be airlifted to the hospital and a few days were spent not knowing how bad the brain damage was.  It's still not known, because he has some mental health issues, so the amount of memory loss and other factors may never be known.  He also had a lot of fractures.  But he is walking and talking and leaving the hospital today.  And all of my husband's family, who are pretty religious(at least much more religious than my family), are saying things like "God is so Good" or "God's plan is amazing". 

So, if your god is so good, where was he/she/it when R. was on the ATV?  Where was he/she/it when R. crashed?  What kind of god is that?  That allows a young man who already has hardships to have an accident.  He may never be able to live alone now.  This young man may have to live with his parents until they die and then, then he'll have to live with family until he dies.  What kind of god is that?  If god were good, why is he/she/it only good in the aftermath, where was he/she/it in the before?  This is one of my biggest pet peeves about people and their god.  God was not good in the before, but oh, now that R is healing, he is good?  No.  Either he/she/it is here or he/she/it isn't.  And if you believe in God's plan, then why don't you talk about it always, as in: I ate breakfast, God's plan; I went to work, God's plan; my car broke down, God's plan?  Either God has a plan or he/she/it doesn't, but that means that God's plan is about everything, not just big things.  Because a plan doesn't work, unless the small stuff leads to the big stuff.

Here's the thing that really bothers me.  Do they really believe that by praying God will intercede for them, but not for the little girl dying of cancer down the hall?  What kind of good God is that?!?  Not one that I recognize.  Either God is good and intercedes for all, or he/she/it is some kind of jerk and only intercedes for those who pray the most.  That's not what the Bible says. 

I don't believe in any of that.  I believe in a God that is not present, that doesn't intercede, ever.  Because I can't believe in a kind and loving God that lets that little girl die or lets that boy over there live without his dad from age 4.  In order to believe in a kind and loving God, you cannot believe in one that intercedes for some, on the basis of prayer, but not for others.  Because that, that is a God who is vengeful.